Let’s talk about Self-esteem!!
thee ESTEEM of YO Selffff.
We don’t talk about this topic enough. In today’s world you are either talked about for having too low of self-esteem or too high of self-esteem. And being in the Colored Community you are automatically expected to have high self-esteem or you are seen as weak, or less than. But we never talk about how one achieves high self-esteem. Either we figure it out or we don’t. So let’s talk about it!
Self-esteem is shaped by your thoughts, relationships and experiences. Believe it or not 85% of the population suffers from low self-esteem according to NBC News.
More then likely if you had a challenging childhood, then your esteem was impacted. Experiences like bullying, child neglect, and abuse, homelessness, and/ or economic instability contribute to Low Self-esteem. Other factors that shape your self-esteem include
Your Perceptions ( is the organization, identification, and interpretation of sensory information in order to represent and understand the presented information or environment). and Thoughts, How Other people interact with you, other experiences with the world around you, Illness, injury or disability, your age, the relationships you have with the people around you and the messages Media sends out. The experiences you have had since childhood begin to shape your overall opinion of yourself and how you feel about what you can and cannot do, and your overall capabilities as a living breathing being. So, If you have received negative messages about yourself, then these will generally impact your self-esteem negatively, If you have received a positive message about yourself and your capabilities, then the esteem of yourself has been impacted negatively. Let’s do a self-esteem test:
- Write a list of 15 positive things about yourself, then write a list of 15 negative things about yourself and start a timer for each list. Record the time it took you to compile each list. Which list was easier to write?
If the list of positive things was easier to write then your doing just fine and your self-esteem is probably more positive, and if the list of negative things was easier to write then your self-esteem is probably low. But this is ok, like we stated before only 15% of the population actually has high self-esteem. Most people could use a boost.
When you have healthy self-esteem, you feel good about the person in the mirror and you believe you deserve respect from those around you. And when your self-esteem is low you devalue your own opinions and ideas, you believe that you aren’t good enough. You may feel that you aren’t worthy of success, and that your experiences don’t hold value. You may have been teased, bullied or just constantly received negative feedback. Maybe you came from a household where nothing you did was ever recognized or good enough. When people say good things about you, it is hard to accept or believe that they are referencing you. Low self-esteem is also a symptom of Depression and Anxiety.
If you think you may have depression check out these two articles:
So let’s talk about how we can give our self-esteem the boost that it needs!
Challenge your negative self-talk
Write a positive list of 50 things you are good at!
Surround yourself with people who speak life and positivity into you
Buy an outfit that looks good on you, and was made for your shape and size
Get your hair done or a fresh cut
Do your nails or go get them done
Go out with your friends who make you feel good
Buy yourself some flowers
Start a friends gifting circle
Establish Self-care routine
refrain from activities that make you feel guilty or bad Afterward.
Request an appointment for therapy today - to help work on your negative self talk and strengthen your self image.
It’s ok to struggle with your self-esteem. But it is your responsibility to address it when you realize you're struggling. You, and you alone, are responsible for the way YOU view yourself. Other people’s opinions of you, are not universal truth and are simply opinions, they are not facts. Your opinion of yourself influences others opinions of you. If you like yourself, other people will like you as well. If you like yourself, you will be too busy liking yourself to be worried about other people's opinions of you. There is nothing wrong with liking yourself and feeling like you are THEE BOMB.COM. The people who have high self-esteem work on it everyday, it's a full-time job.
If you don't like yourself it will seem like the world doesn't like you either. Your opinion of yourself is the only one that matters, and If you don’t like something either change it or change your mindset about it! Remember you are uniquely you and that is what makes you AMAZING.